


The Impossible (and possible)

by grass_tastes_bad_69



Category: Hazbin Hotel (Web Series)
Genre: Alastor Has a Heart (Hazbin Hotel), Ambiguous/Open Ending, Angst, Hurt No Comfort, M/M, Protective Alastor (Hazbin Hotel), Sorta Happy Ending, Suicide, This Is STUPID, a bit OOC, basically angel fucking dies and alastor doesn't know how to cope, no beta we die like men, satan and lucifer arent the same person, so he makes a deal with satan
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-28
Updated: 2020-10-28
Packaged: 2021-03-09 05:20:20
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,430
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27249445
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/grass_tastes_bad_69/pseuds/grass_tastes_bad_69
Summary: Alastor went over towards Angel, and crouched next to him. Angel felt cold, and Alastor suddenly felt a bit of doubt...He didn’t want to forget. Didn’t want to forget all the wonderful moments he had shared with the love of his afterlife. He didn’t know what he’d do without Angel...Surely it would be better to never know him, than to feel this immense pain and guilt for one second longer.But that begged the question, would he rather live a life without Angel, or live a life knowing that the one person he’s ever loved is gone?-i.e Angel fucking dies and Alastor will do anything to bring him back.
Relationships: Alastor & Lucifer Magne, Alastor/Angel Dust (Hazbin Hotel), Angel Dust & Cherri Bomb (Hazbin Hotel)
Comments: 2
Kudos: 60





	The Impossible (and possible)

**Author's Note:**

> TW: Suicide 
> 
> before we get into this shit fest, I just want yall to know that I made everything in this up- like it's not based off any religions or anything. All of it is purely fictional and is just shit I made up for the sake of plot convenience or just cause I thought it would be interesting.

“Anthony dear- why are you giving me these?” 

“It’s a gift- don't tell me ya’ve never gotten a gift before Smiles.” 

Alastor shook his head,”Darling, you told me this bracelet belonged to your sister- I surely can’t just take it. It’s your favorite.” 

“Yes, ya can just take it. Cause I’m giving it ta ya.” 

“And what about the bow then?” 

“Isn’t it adorable?! It matches mine- I thought it’d be cute!” 

Angel gently began to tie the black bow with a red dot in the middle around Alastor’s neck. 

“Plus- this way ya can always have a part of me with ya. Forever.” 

“Why would I suffice for just a part of you, when the full you is right in front of me?” 

Angel shot Alastor a look,”Ya know what I meant. That way- well, in case something happens. Ya know?” 

Alastor’s brows furrowed in concern,”Angel, don’t talk like that.” 

Angel just sighed,”Don’t look at me like that with yer bambi eyes. Just accept the damn gifts, alright Al?” 

Alastor carefully rubbed his thumb against the bracelet. It had smooth round pink beads strung on a golden chain. Alastor knew Angel hardly ever took it off, it was the last thing his sister ever gave him before Angel had to stop seeing her due to his father. 

It didn’t feel right to accept something Alastor knew Angel held so near and dear to his heart. 

Angel could tell Alastor was having doubts, as he looked up at him with wide and pleading eyes,”Please Al?” 

Alastor looked at his lover, his smile shrunk to something much more genuine. How could he say no to those eyes? 

“Alright, _mon ange_. You win. Thank you, for these lovely gifts. I will cherish them.” 

A wide grin grew onto Angel’s face, as he climbed into Alastor’s lab. Quickly looking up to him for permission, Alastor give a quick nod, to which Angel nuzzled into Alastor’s chest.  
  
Alastor held Angel close, as his arms looped around the other. He found his breathing falling in sync with Angel’s as they both just sat there in each other’s embrace, in complete and utter bliss. 

“I love ya, I’ll always love ya Al. I just need ya ta know that,” Angel whispered quietly. 

Alastor’s breath caught in his throat, even after almost two years of dating, hearing ‘I love you’ still made his stomach churn with butterflies. 

Yet, a sudden feeling of dread accompanied them this time, for reasons Alastor just couldn’t explain... 

“You say that like you’re going somewhere. Are you planning some vacation without my knowledge darling?” 

Angel chuckled,”No- no vacation.” 

“Well, I love you too Angel. I always will.” 

“No matter what?” 

“No matter what,” Alastor answered. 

\-   
“Cherri dear, calm down. I don’t understand a single thing that you’re trying to say,” Alastor tried to calm down the blabbering cyclops, as he rubbed his tired eyes. 

Cherri had knocked upon Alastor’s door late at night, going on and on about something so fast Alastor couldn’t even comprehend. 

“It’s Angel!” Cherri exclaimed. 

Alastor’s blood went cold as he instantly woke up,”What about Angel? Is he okay? Where is he?” 

“He- he won’t answer any of my calls or texts, and I went to his apartment, but the bathroom’s door locked, and he won’t respond but I can hear him crying in there, and I tried to kick it down, but I think he’s up against it or something? It won’t budge, and I was going to call you, but then I remembered that you don’t have a ph-” 

Before Cherri could finish her nervous ramble, Alastor slunk into the shadows, quickly trying to get himself to his destination. 

Alastor was soon outside Angel’s bathroom. He could barely feel his hands, Alastor didn’t notice he was shaking this entire time. 

Alastor knocked on the door, trying to respect the other’s privacy still, in hopes that Angel was just taking a bath and Cherri was overreacting,”Angel- Anthony? Darling, please answer the door.” 

When there was nothing but silence, Alastor repeated himself a bit louder, his voice more manic. 

With still no answer, Alastor quickly traveled under the door through his shadows, as his breathing quickened. 

What he saw will forever be engraved in his mind. 

Angel, his Angel, laid lifelessly on the floor. A pool of blood underneath him. A gun on the floor next to his outstretched hand. Alastor never prayed, if that wasn’t obvious enough- but in that moment he prayed for Angel. He prayed to God that there were no holy bullets in that gun. 

A million thoughts ran through his head, each question he came up with producing ten more. It didn’t take a genius to know that Angel had done this to himself. Alastor desperately wanted to know why, wanted to know if it was something he did- if he failed Angel in some way. 

He cursed at himself for not seeing all the signs earlier. Angel acting extra affectionate and nice, giving away all his belongings, telling everyone how much he loved them...he was saying goodbye. And Alastor had failed to realize the clear and obvious warning signs. 

Alastor scrambled down over to Angel’s side, as he pulled him onto his lap to inspect him. The bullet must’ve entered from one side of his head, and out the other. Alastor leaned down and put his head onto Angel’s chest. Willing for the slightest bit of movement. The slightest hint that he was still breathing. 

There was nothing.   
  
The tears began to fall, as Alastor tried to keep himself composed. Yet his efforts were for nothing, as he began to sob. 

“Please don’t leave me!” Alastor shouted, in complete hysterics.   
\-   
Lucifer rarely saw Alastor, despite the two having somewhat of a friendship and a mutual respect, it’s not like they hung out regularly or anything of the sort. They usually only bothered each other when interested in making a deal. 

So, when Alastor practically busted down his door, while carrying a lifeless Angel Dust, Lucifer was shocked- to say the least. 

“Alastor- how nice of you to stop by. But, excuse me, what the fuck?!” 

“I need your help Luci. You need to bring him back!” Alastor looked like shit, his hair was disheveled, his eyes wide and red from tears probably, and blood stained his clothes. Lucifer knew this must’ve been serious if Alastor had used his nickname. 

Lucifer looked down at the dead demon in Alastor’s arms, his eyes widened once he realized what he was being asked. 

Lucifer took a few more steps towards the demon and went to touch the entrance wound. It burned just a little bit, but notable enough for him to know that Angel had been touched by holy material recently. 

“You know as well as I do that there’s no going back from a holy weapon. His soul has been erased. What you’re holding right now that’s dripping blood all over my marble floors, is an empty vessel.” 

Lucifer’s eyes softened to that of pity,”He’s gone for good.” 

Alastor looked down at Angel sadly, as he placed a gentle kiss on his forehead, before carefully placing him on a nearby seat, putting him in a comfortable position. 

“Alastor what the fuck you asshole, you’re going to get blood all over my favorite chair-” 

“I am not leaving this house until you complete my requests. Besides, you and me both know that erasing story is complete and utter bullshit.” 

“I will force you out Alastor, you do not want to challenge me,” Lucifer demanded, his voice stern. 

“You wouldn’t harm me Luci.” 

Lucifer stayed silent, as he fumed inside, because he knew Alastor was right. 

“Then you better settle in old friend, because there’s no way to bring him back. It's _impossible_.” 

“I will wait for the rest of time if I must, but I suppose I should make myself comfortable.” 

Alastor grabbed a champagne class and a bottle of wine, quickly pouring himself some. 

He took a sip, as he looked over at Lucifer,”I was never much of a religious man. But even I heard the stories of your Father bringing someone back to life, after they were left to rot in some cave.” 

“You know very well that’s different, he’s God- He created the universe and it’s rules, and like the hypocritical bastard that He is, He’ll happily break them when it pleases Him as well.” 

“I suppose, but you’re the almighty Lucifer! The- the best angel! God’s favorite! Surely you can do a task as simple as returning a lost soul to its proper body.” 

Lucifer sighed,”Do you know what happens to souls when they’re exterminated?” 

“No, I’ve never had the displeasure.” 

Lucifer realized Alastor wouldn’t leave his house until he got some sort of a solution. Lucifer eyed the bleeding corpse on his chair, his favorite chair, and shuddered. He wanted to get it out of here before it started to smell... 

“Alright, fine- perhaps souls aren’t exactly erased after they’ve been exterminated like the legends say.” 

Alastor’s ears perked up,”What does happen to those lost souls, Luci?” 

“No soul is lost; every soul is exactly where they ought to b-” 

“Where are souls kept?” Alastor asked, more forcibly this time. 

Lucifer shook his head,”You’ll have to travel to the underworld.” 

“I thought this _was_ the underworld.” 

“If you want my help Alastor, then you should learn to keep your mouth shut,” Lucifer snapped, already annoyed by all of these questions. 

The room went silent, before Lucifer continued,”You’ll need to travel to the underworld, and speak with Satan himself.” 

Alastor went to open his mouth before Lucifer cut him off,”And no- I am not Satan. You have no idea how annoying that assumption has been to explain, which is why I prefer to just not.” 

Lucifer rolled his eyes,”It’s so annoying that all humans confuse me with such a being, because of them they all suspect I’m a goat! A filthy animal!” 

Lucifer soon realized he had begun to ramble, so he cleared his throat and continued,”Anyways- while I was once God’s greatest creation, the best out of the best- the morning star and light for all, Satan was...well, they’re an idea. An embodiment of chaos and destruction.” 

“They are also the ruler of the underworld, the place that houses souls that have left their vessel. Sorta like a double Hell even. While it is their duty to make sure no soul leaves from their care...” 

Alastor drooped, what would he do if they wouldn’t budge and release Angel’s soul? 

“But- they are also an entity that prides themself on chaos, as stated before. They won’t be able to pass up a deal, but...There will be consequences. Satan doesn’t make deals based off what they need, there is no rhyme or reason for what they ask for. Their goal is to make you as miserable as possible...are you willing to have to give up whatever it is you desire most?” 

“The only thing I desire- is him.” Alastor’s eyes trailed over towards Angel. 

”Alright- I will help you. But don’t say I didn’t warn you.” 

Lucifer got up from his seat and went over towards one of his bookshelves. After a moment, he plucked an old and torn book from the top shelf. He flicked through a couple pages, before making a satisfied hum. 

“There you are,” he mumbled to himself. 

Lucifer sat back down in his chair,”Now- are you ready to create a portal to the underworld, old friend?”   
\-   
Alastor blinked slowly a few times, as he adjusted to his new surroundings. One moment he was in Lucifer’s living room, the next he was in a barren wasteland that was nothing but red sand and fire. Alastor noticed a glowing river besides him though that seemed to be the only water source for miles (judging by the dry looking landscape), he paid little attention to it, it didn’t seem important at the moment. He wasn’t here for sightseeing; he was here to retrieve what is his. 

“ **Ah, a new soul. Still attached to your vessel as well, I’ve always liked them fresh,** ” a deep and calm voice spoke from behind. 

Alastor turned towards the voice and was almost shocked at who was before him. Or, perhaps _what_ was before him... 

The entity wore a large black cloak that trailed behind, the only thing that could be seen was their face. The entity’s face was less a face, and more so a skull with no flesh or fur attached. They were like a walking skeleton. Their skull resembled that of a goat, and two small horns poked out from under the cloak. 

“I’m sorry dear, but I intend to keep my soul where it belongs. I am only here to fetch a lost one.” 

The goat titled it’s head slightly, **”Lost soul? Why, we have none of these here.”**

“But I believe you do. His name is Anthony, but he also goes by Angel Dust.” 

**“Oh of course- the new arrival. We usually don’t get a lot of those this time of year, which is very...interesting, don’t you think?”**

**“You know, the thing about souls- they're desperate to stay connected to their vessels. Even more so in Hell. I could cut you up into a million little pieces- but yet, your soul will always come back to your body."**

**“What happened to Mr. Dust, well- it was no accident. Souls are too persistent to just be ripped away from their vessel over something unintentional. Angel's soul had to fight and claw his way out of his miserable vessel. No, Angel- he belongs down here...Perhaps, perhaps he even wanted it.”**

Alastor’s blood began to boil,” Y̸̝͈̏o̷͚͛̍̃ǘ̶̗̫ ̴̞͒͆͊k̸̫͊͒̂n̶̲̰̿̑͗ö̴̼͉̲́ẉ̶̩͛ ̴̟͑͑͝n̷͉̟̽͘ȏ̵̢̟͜t̸̖̱̹̿͆h̷̲̼̹̾̊̚i̵̜̟͌͝n̸͔͉̊̄ğ̵͕̺̊ ̴̡̖͕̏̋a̶̺̼̓̈́b̴̗͖͐̉̈́ȯ̵̼ǔ̴͚̦͓t̴͎̑̾͝ ̸̫͐̄͘h̸̹̙̻͊̑i̸͇̤̟͗̕m̸͉̾̐̃!̴͔̤̂͒ͅ ̵̫̱̯̎̀H̴͔̜̏̽̀ẹ̸̘̅̆̋͜-̸̣̳͕̋̑́ ̵̼͎͗̚ḣ̴̬ę̸̱͉̐̽ ̴̜̩̣̊̅͊b̵̛̪̓̽e̴̯͔̝̎̈̅l̷͇͐o̷̧̲͇̓̅̚n̵͎̟̹̄̓͠g̴͙̬͋̒͋s̵̨͕̲̏̾ ̵͔̓w̵̭̄i̷̺͖͒̒͑t̷̘̙̭̋͌h̶̠̚ ̵͉͝m̴͇̺͉̎͘ẹ̷̳̇̚,̵̺̾̋ ̸̗͓͈̏̕ȉ̶̡̠n̶̹̆́͛ ̷̧̝̬̉H̴̗̑̂͐e̵͇̗̍̚l̶̟̭̑͂ĺ̴̥̥!̵̣̎̌ ̶̟͓̆̉͜Ñ̸̳̓̐o̷̘͇̳̕t̵͖͚̭̋̆̄ ̴͈͘͜ḩ̷̈́̾e̷̥̋͂̚r̷̢͙̄̅e̷͇̗̒͘!̴̝͈̞̓́” 

The entity went silent, before they continued on, choosing to ignore Alastor’s outburst, **”If you are that persistent that Angel’s soul is reunited with his vessel, well- I'm sure there’s something we could do about that. But I never do anything for free, dear Alastor.”**

“How do you know my name?” 

The entity once more, choose to ignore Alastor’s comment, **”Tell me- how badly do you want Angel back?”**

“I want him back more than anything. I’d give the world and more if asked.” 

**“Oh- how silly, I’m not asking for the world. I’m asking for Angel Dust.”**

“What do you mean?” It was now Alastor’s turn to tilt his head in confusion. 

**“I will return Angel Dust’s soul to his body, if you give up every single memory you have of him. Not just you, of course- everyone around you will forget about your relationship. It will be like you two never met. You probably will never meet after the fact either, you’ll both be destined to be alone for the rest of time...or until your souls are returned to me. Tell me, dear, is it worth the hefty price?”**

Alastor hesitated, he’d have to forfeit all his memories with Angel? To have to live the rest of his time in Hell, thinking that he never met the love of his afterlife? To be forgotten by Angel as well? 

“Yes, it is worth it,” Alastor finally answered after he had a moment to ponder and weigh his options. 

**“Splendid,”** the entity outstretched their hand towards Alastor, **”shall we shake on it?”**

Alastor looked down at the offered hand, before grabbing it firmly and shaking it. Suddenly, he felt like his whole entire hand was on fire, he thought he could hear the sizzling flesh as well. In fact- it wasn’t just his hand that had even touched the entity, it was _both_ of them. 

If Alastor wasn’t in an unbearable amount of pain right now, he’d think it was rather odd and strange.   
  
Alastor kept a straight face though, he didn’t want to appear weak. Yet he couldn’t help how he bit back his tongue as a few muffled screams of pain escaped. 

Finally, the entity released Alastor. Alastor immediately looked down at his hands, he noticed they were both now completely black, and didn’t match the grey of his skin at all anymore. They were practically unrecognizable. 

The entity paid no attention to Alastor, as they walked past Alastor towards the wide river behind him. They kneeled next to the water and stuck their hand under the surface. After a moment, they pulled their hand out from under, and emerged with a small glowing pink ball. 

Alastor turned towards them, eyes wide. He had never seen anything like it before. He found himself...mesmerized by it even. 

“Is...is that...” Alastor trailed off. 

**“Yes, it’s Angel’s soul.”**

With a flick of their hand, the entity also materialized Angel’s corpse in front of the two. Alastor’s eyes widened. 

**“Once I place the soul back, no one will have any recollection of the two of you. Not even yourselves. One day you could be walking through Hell, and notice Angel on another demon’s shoulder, and you will have no idea that he used to be on your shoulder not so long ago.”**

**“...And while your vessel may forget, the soul does not. Deep down, you’ll feel awful and jealous to see him with someone new. Yet you won’t know why. You’ll be forever trapped by your own emotions...Alastor, dear, I will ask you one more time. Do you want to do this?”**

“Wait- can I say goodbye? To Angel?” 

Alastor motioned over to the lifeless corpse. 

**”You have one minute.”**

Alastor went over towards Angel, and crouched next to him. Angel felt cold, and Alastor suddenly felt a bit of doubt...He didn’t want to forget. Didn’t want to forget all the wonderful moments he had shared with the love of his afterlife. He didn’t know what he’d do without Angel...Surely it would be better to never know him, than to feel this immense pain and guilt for one second longer. 

But that begged the question, would he rather live a life without Angel, or live a life knowing that the one person he’s ever loved is gone? 

Alastor’s eyes caught on the matching bow on Angel’s neck, a sigh escaping his lips. 

“I’ll find you one day, _mon ange_. I’ll find you, I promise.” 

Alastor laid a soft kiss on his forehead. 

Alastor turned out and went back to his spot,”I’m ready.” 

A sick and sadistic smile grew upon the goat’s face, **”Wonderful dear, truly wonderful.”**

As the entity kneeled next to Angel’s corpse, with his soul in hand, Alastor asked,”You’re Satan, aren’t you?” 

**“I cannot be classified darling. I am the impossible and the possible, the dream and the nightmare, the everything and the nothing. I am an idea, I am everything that goes bump in the night- I am your greatest fear...But yes, I do answer to the name Satan.”**  
\-   
Alastor’s stomach churned, as he heard cries from inside the butcher’s shop from the lamb he had greeted almost moments before. Something inside him snapped at the screams of anguish, of her pleads. He didn’t know why- but something about this seemed so very familiar to him. 

His heart ached for some reason, as he tried to recall where he had seen something like this before...yet nothing came up. 

No matter the reason though, Alastor knew he had to put a stop to this. Just something about seeing someone in power taking advantage of the less privileged, well...it angered him to no ends. Almost as if he’d seen it before, but he knew that couldn’t be the case...   
\-   
Alastor chuckled and adjusted his spectacle, as the demon he assumed to be Vaggie glared daggers at him from across the room. If looks could kill, he’d be six feet under by now. 

“Oh ho ho, you’re going to need more than _that_.” 

Alastor turned around towards the spider that sat on a stool near the back. Something about him seemed appealing to Alastor, almost as if he was a moth being drawn to a flame. It was a weird and unknown sensation to him, but he chalked it up to just his morbid curiosity about who this new demon was. 

Alastor bent down to the other demon’s eye level,”And what can you do my effeminate fellow?” 

Angel gave Alastor a quick once over, a smirk growing onto his face,”I can suck ya dick!” 

**Author's Note:**

> I might add more chapters some day- but for now it's just a one shot. I wanted to make it somewhat based in canon- and so I got this idea about Alastor trading his memories of Angel for Angel's life/soul/whatever, and that's why they don't know each other in the pilot. I don't know, just thought it'd be interesting. This was pretty fun to write, tbh. 
> 
> Anyways, I've rambled enough. I barely edited this, so I might revise it and polish it up in the future, but for the time being, here you go. Enjoy ig lmao.


End file.
